Learn How to Craft Intimacy in Sex with an Emotional Lead

FWSG Blog Post #9

Crafting intimacy in sex is what I believe to be one of the most important things a writer can learn to enrich their stories. I see authors twist themselves up with how to write what I’ll call the picture of sex, which may only be the telling of what’s happening, devoid of the meaning behind it. In fact, the motivation or emotion behind the *want to*, can steal the show.

Can intimate closeness trump climax? Well, you can write a climax without it, but when you have all the sticky, wonderful connections of emotion that come through in the physical embodiment of sex, then your scene will be off-the-charts hot.

Why Are Characters Having Sex?

Do you ask yourself: why are my characters having sex? That is the characters, not the author deciding to add a sex scene. Do you ask what is the meaning of the sex they are having? What is the actual progression of how they got to whatever sexual activity they are engaging in? Sexy texting, phone sex, masturbation, oral delights, whatever.

Think meaning of sex = type of sex. If you understand why your characters are engaging in sexual activity, then the scene serves as a tool for character development and advances the story.

Where is the Character in their Sexual Journey?

It’s important to know where the characters are in their own sexual journeys. This is where their sexual history comes in. Do you have a mismatch of sexual experiences, ideas, or beliefs? This is where you can create tension in the story. How would attitudes come into play with interactions? If you have made the character bible that holds this necessary information, there is so much material available on the meaning of sex. Think of this as a treasure trove of material from which to pull.

Scene Types for Intimacy in Sex

When writing scenes with sex, considering your scene types is helpful. This refers to the selection of characters in the scene, the number, their environment and what they will be doing. Choosing your scene type is like choosing the physical embodiment of sex. The place will add elements to sexuality that heighten the tension for your characters. Maybe one is comfortable with the location and one is not. How can the place, people and activities spark the sexual interactions? Consider how the individuals are connected to them.

Take Aways

Let emotions undress your characters while you build scenes with sex using depth and meaning.

Consider the individuals and how their sexual journey will enhance or cause tension in the scene with sex. Both can be good depending on the narrative arc of the story.

Use your people, places, and activities to highlight how you will accomplish sexual activity. This will add variety and keep your reader engaged.

Identifying the meaning of sex at the beginning of the story will make your characters more interesting and vibrant.

If this is your first read on The Fiction Writer’s Sexuality Guide Blog Posts, start at the beginning. The Book comes out on May 28, 2024